i’ve had to ask a LOT of people for help over the past few days. its not something that i like to do. i’ve had to ask for advice and assistance and even food. i’ve also had to ask for forgiveness, as i’ve not come through on my word, either.
i can’t seem to get it together.
i’m just at a place where i need help. i need it. and i don’t want to admit that i need it. but i do.
i’m being humbled and broken. all in answer to prayers.
every time i pray for humility, i get a quick answer from God. this week is no exception.
every time i pray for a soft heart, i get a quick answer from God. this week is no exception.
He answers a lot of my prayers. He does. but, i don’t pray much…
i really don’t.
i’m beginning to think that my resistance to prayer might have something to do with my resistance to help.
i think i’m the same way.
Totally understand. God gave me a kick in the pants this week too. (And just think the week just began
)
The week just began? i know…. at the rate i’m going, though, that’s NOT the happiest thought!!!! i’ll be in sackcloth & ashes before its all over with.
I’m praying for you today Mandy. ((((((Hug)))))
There is something about people who have a servant heart…sometimes it is hard to be the one on the receiving end.
There is a beautiful thing about the body of Christ…we DO need eachother.
I get what you are saying about prayer too…it makes sense.
Mandy:
KNOWING you need help is a serious step. But instead of focusing on that positive attribute, the enemy–whoever THAT is–is keeping you bogged down with all of your “I don’t pray enough, I don’t do this enough, I’m not humble enough to accept help…”
Accept that you have accepted that you need help. Take a deep, trusting breath. And go from there. And KEEP GOING. It’s only a week. You’ve made it through plenty of weeks before. And some that were probably much, much worse than this one. And if that is true, then take a moment and realize, “Well, I made it this far…I can make it through this week…this DAY…”
By the way, I don’t pray enough, either. But I’m learning what it means to “pray without ceasing,” which I think means to keep God close to your thoughts. No matter what they are. I figure He already knows what I’m thinking so there is no sense in my trying to hide it.
I remember you had written a post a few days ago that asked, “How you do you deal with pain?” Well, I thought about it for a while and realized that I just tell God about my pain. Whatever it is. Whether I’m shaking my fist at Him in a maddening rage of grief or I am overwhelmed with sorrow at the loss of a loved one or I’m frustrated because my whole seems so impossible…There is NOTHING I can say to God that He doesn’t already know I want to say. Nothing I can feel that He doesn’t already know about. So…I tell Him.
Might as well, right? He already knows anyway.
And while what I’m written, what I do, may not be a very holy thing to admit, I would still rather be honest with God than try to act like nothing is bothering me. And I always…ALWAYS…come full circle. Eventually. I realize that He is so much bigger than me or you or her or him and I am, quite simply, far, far too incompetent to understand the questions. And that makes me realize that it is not God I am raging against, but my own incompetence.
It helps.
And it helps a lot.
And that one word “HELP!” is my most common prayer.
And, hey, if I made it this far…
What can I do for you? Seriously. What?
Nor – great response!! Well said.
Cindy:
thank you
my first response was the proverbial sunday school answer: pray for me!
then, i wandered around on your blog (which rocks, btw) while trying to give a real and genuine answer to your question: what can you do for me?…… problem is that i don’t know. i don’t know…. that probably goes hand-in-hand with not wanting help. sometimes i don’t know what others could do to help me, because i’m that closed off to even the thought of needing help…
so. today i say that i don’t know how you can help me.
i need deep quiet soul rest. and i really need an emotional breather right now. those things i KNOW i need, but i don’t know how others can help me get them.
and rest is coming. the week is a refreshing and reflective week for me… and the weekend is coming. rest is coming. my soul waits more than watchmen wait for the morning…
TheNor: reminds me of the Ebenezer stones: “Thus far the Lord has helped me.” today IS a “thus far” day…..
Oh, I know the feeling. For me, it’s that pesky independence that is so ingrained in me. Not that it isn’t good to have a healthy dose of independence, because I believe it can be. But, for me, my need to be independent is so strong that I find it very difficult to ever allow myself to depend on (i.e., accept help from!) anyone else…including my husband…and my Savior!
And sometimes, allowing someone else to help us when we need it is just as much of a blessing to the person helping as it is to the person needing help. I know you blessed me this week by showing me that I still have some of my old spunk!
Love ya…praying for ya!
sarah: thank you… for all of it.
You and me, Mandy.
God is doing the same thing in my prayers for the last forty days. Every prayer request gets answered within 24 hours.
That made me think: there is stuff I am not taking to my Lord because I was afraid of what the answer would be.
Because He is so good and He is so faithful, I took to Him all of my questions, even the scary ones.
He answered them one by one and then sent confirmations afterwards.
It all started with our brokenness and contriteness of our hearts. We bow before Him in our hearts and on our knees and we know that He is our God and we are His people.
With Him as my Lord, I only want His will to be done.
“It all started with our brokenness and contriteness of our hearts. We bow before Him in our hearts and on our knees and we know that He is our God and we are His people.”
yep
i read psalm 51 as a part of worship yesterday afternoon. yep yep yep…..
I’ve learned that the way to anything with Christ is humility. And it doesn’t have to be difficult. The more we humble ourselves the more of His Spirit we’ll have, which means we’ll have more of what we need, desire, and long for, but are too stubborn to ask for. Hmmm, circular isn’t it. I know that a few years ago God taught me, “I will not bless what you will not bend to.” He’s right. The more I bend to him, the more he blesses. The more I am yeiled to the Spirit, the more I am filled with the Spirit. It’s a daily practice. Sometimes I get it WAY wrong, sometimes he and I are so in sync. Great thing is, He never leaves me.
Humility is good. The hardest part is going from my butt to my knee, literally. That 3 second motion is one of the most difficult ever. It’s getting easier.
Love you
What I love about asking for help is that God often hears the prayers of others when, for whatever reason (lack of group effort? body strength?”), the Lord hears and gives me relief.
We pray for relief and reprieve for you…all together.
Mags: thank you. again and again………
Praying for you friend, Mandy
With love,
holly
I’m with you Mandy. The scaffolding of my personal pride keeps me from experiencing authentic community. Praying for you.
May I recommend Romans 8:18-27 (I wish I could say I can’t identify with you, but I’ve been there all too many times – although I’d add that I’m stubborn; ahhh, but the HOly Spirit prays for us in our weakness, what an awesome God):
18I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with sthe glory that will be revealed in us. 19The creation waits in eager expectation for the sons of God to be revealed. 20For the creation was subjected to frustration, not by its own choice, but by the will of the one who subjected it, in hope 21that[i] the creation itself will be liberated from its bondage to decay and brought into the glorious freedom of the children of God.
22We know that the whole creation has been groaning as in the pains of childbirth right up to the present time. 23Not only so, but we ourselves, who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for our adoption as sons, the redemption of our bodies. 24For in this hope we were saved. But hope that is seen is no hope at all. Who hopes for what he already has? 25But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently.
26In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express. 27And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints in accordance with God’s will.
Holly: thank you! good to see you here!!!
Pete: many thanks – for your authenticity
Dan: love that verse. will remember it…… Spirit is interceding even when i don’t know what/how to pray