in honor of last week being the toughest week of my job/work transition, this NOT-SO-CRAZY-WEEK will have the theme CRAZY!!!
yay!
and each afternoon i’ll throw a post up that tells you something crazy about ME. yes. i do actually have craziness. i do. justaskmyhusband.
let’s start with a “gross-out”: saliva makes me nauseous – mainly other people’s …mainly. but, you know when you get nauseated you start salivating? its a vicious cycle. i’m getting grossed-out just typing this…
so! change of subject:
who’s in?
who’s crazy?
who’s with me!?
share one of YOUR “gross-outs” so we can call you crazy, too!
ps: Gnarls Barkley rules
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ok. not that i want to be like you or anything. but one of my big gross-outs is kinda on the same lines as saliva too. only i take issue with the thicker more yellowish “saliva” that sometimes strings from the top lip to the bottom lip while someone’s talking. it makes you wanta puke. you dont want to look at it. but you’re drawn to it like a 52 car pile up. you wanta take a pencil and chop-suey it just so you can get on with whatever the person is talking about.
Oh I could be here all afternoon, but someone (ME!!) needs to bring home the bacon.
Ok,
It totally grosses me out when someone is knawing on their food and they have sound effects. (shhh.. right now, my co worker is eating a bag of chips, hear in Chula Vista (so close to the border) we put Tapatio on everything. So this it what it sounds like:
crunch, lick, smack, crunch, slurp, slurp, crunch “Oh she said that did she”, crunch, smack, lick slurp slurp…
Someone hold me down before this ole christian bowls her over.
Oh, Heidi, I feel your pain. Oh, how I feel it (like, right now). One of my (many) pet peeves is loud chip eating. Not only does it literally make my ears hurt, it totally grosses me out. And someone in my office is eating chips. Loudly. Right now. Ewwwww… My ears are bleeding…
And hair. Hair (on the floor of the bathroom, in the shower, on clothes, etc.) totally grosses me out.
My stomach hurts now from all of this talk of nasty things.
Mandy, saliva grosses you out??
How does Mr.Mandy feel about this??
For me, TALK of vomit grosses me out. Just the TALK and THOUGHT of it really actually makes me sick at my stomach. Worrying about whether or not I am going to vomit makes me sick at my stomach. So, you can imagine how I’m feeling at this moment. *gag*
Did I mis-spell whether? I stewed over it for a moment. Now it’s bothering me. Hmmm…. also another pet peeve. Okay, no, I think it’s right. Right?
I don’t know if I can actually read all these comments – I am seriously getting nauseated! However, I can’t help but add to the grossness –
Any and all things hospital. The smells. The sickness. The bodily fluids. The strange noises coming from the room next door.
(Two of my friends are nurses and I adore them! Because goodness knows a good nurse makes all the difference and I could never, ever, ever do it. I would faint just walking in the door . . .God bless all you hospital people!!!)
Nothing really bothers me……I work with mentally retarded children……need I say more
this might help gross you out:
you know those have you ever questions. i was asked this one and literally almost puked. i know i gagged.
would you rather eat a jar of boogers or phelgm/flem (sp?)?
dis.gust.ing.
TAM – that was way too graphic…I’m dry heaving now!
I’m really grossed out when my husband blows his snot into his hand. It’s really as gross as it sounds!!!
I was going to say the same thing as Tam. but I thought of another one
I can’t stand to watch people spit while brushing their teeth. for some reason it totally grosses me out.
Judi – I’M grossed out that your husband blows his snot into his hand! i think i just tasted my pb&j again.
Judi, does your husband know you just threw him under the bus?
Face it ladies, we’re guys. We’re gross. Rarely smooth. We are almost never VERY clean.
It’s not that we don’t try… we just have more important stuff to worry about than that bit of saliva, snot, etc.
In our wonderful sense of double-standards, please don’t make us change poopie diapers, clean up the vomit when the kids “missed” the toilet, or other potentially yucky stuff that we didn’t produce.
Reality check:
Being a father of four, I have to say that gross atrocities galore have come upon me.
The most gross thing that’s happened to me, is when our oldest, when he was six months old… let’s just say, it’s a very bad idea to hold your baby way up high and play with him, just after he’s nursed.
Stuff can flow from one mouth, fall about two feet, and land into the other mouth. Very, very bad moment. But I can say that little really grosses me out anymore.
Finding my kids boogers wiped on walls grosses me out. There is no shortage of appropriate paper products in the house for dealing with this issue so WHY they wipe them on the walls is beyond me!
Also, feet. Male feet. Female feet can be kinda sexy when cared for. Baby feet are adorable. Feet that are male and older than 2 or 3 disgust me. They smell. They’re hairy. They’re…funky. The other night I caught a glimpse of my 7 year old bent over gnawing on the toenail of one lower appendage and I nearly lost.my.dinner. BLEEEECH!!!!
i’m so not hungry anymore.
but, i asked for it! dang. i should’ve thought twice about this post.
ugh…..
brandy: how does mr.mandy feel? i try not to tell him. but he works with me. he does.
the guys have definitely out grossed everything!
That was so gross the video isn’t even available anymore.
Why, MAndy??? WHY? *gagging emoticon*
doo doo doo doo, doo doo do, doo, doo, doo,doo, do. do, do, do, do do….(that’s the Jepardy theme. Anybody actually get that? It’s okay…) “today’s question: Who will barf first?”
Grossness… Let’s see. Grossness is an actual word. That’s astounding. Who would have thought? Also, this seems to be more like “whose husband is the grossest?”
Since I don’t have a husband, I’ll take something I observed several weeks ago. Some of the girls on the dorm floor decide, “hey. Instead of flushing my Raman Noodles down the toilet, I’ll just put them in the sink. I’m sure they’ll evaporate into thin air in no time!” So when you wake up in the morning to brush your teeth, you scoot into the community bathroom (don’t get me started on HAIR ALLL over the shower.. barfity barf), eyes not fully awake, and you see slimy little noodles all over the stinking sink. It makes me want to ralph until the sun goes down.
Gnarles Barkley is old. That’s why he friggin’ rocks.
michelle: i know. i’m so sorry. really. cover your eyes and stop reading the comments… it’ll go away soon.
becca: wow. i don’t know what’s worse – the noodles, or the hair.
Goodness, I’m glad saliva doesn’t gross me out. It’s practically my job to deal with it!
I am a nurse anesthetist, and I have to suction it out of people’s mouths all day long! And I bet you guys thought anesthesia was a glamorous job! 
I can watch all of the gross medical shows with a big plate of food on my lap and not think a thing about it anymore!
The thing that totally grosses me out, though, is finding a hair in my food! I gag just thinking about it!
i have issues with saliva too… it interferes in marital bliss/kiss all-too-often, which is highly unfortunate.
yah. stringy kisses.
not so much.
touchofglory: UGH UGH UGH UGH!!!!!! i had to stop reading your paragraph about sucking saliva. i can’t even get through typing the words. UGH UGH UGH!!!!!!!!!!!
Alece: yes. girl. yes. i’ll never forget my first french kiss in highschool. it was thoroughly gross.
tam: ICK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I can handle people related grossness, I had to clean up my 90 year old step-mother when she could no longer get out of bed and go to the bathroom. Cleaning up cat vomit and cat poop is another story. People feel bad when they make a mess. Cats seem proud of their handy work.
Speaking of heaving makes me think of a scene in the “Great Santini”. Rober Duval played a Marine pilot. In the scene he throws up in front of some high ranking officers. His Marine buddies get down on the floor and eat his vomit.
Enjoy your dinner.
Ed, you have officially crossed the line.
mandy. i know this is YOUR blog, but…
ED! GO TO YOUR ROOM!!!
cats seem proud.
UGH!
and the movie story was UNNECESSARY ed! UNNECESSARY!!!!!
oh gosh. oh gosh. oh gosh.
wow.
i’ve never more “regretted” a blog post before. well, maybe there’s one or two that bit me in the butt, but this one just keeps biting!!!!!
maybe i should say —comments closed—
wow.
Ok – I love you and all Mandy but I could only get to comment #10 and I was TOTALLY GROSSED OUT! Couldn’t read any more of your dear commentuers. I will come back tomorrow for your next crazy segment. See you soon girl.
@ngie: don’t worry. i’ve stopped reading the comments as well!!!
I worked in a nursing home while in college, was a special education teacher, and I have 4 children. Not much grosses me out. I can watch the hospital shows over dinner too without a problem. My husband, on the other hand, throws up if he has to clean out the garbage can…. let alone cleaning up after his kids messy issues.
One time when I was in high school, our dog puked up a groundhog he had just eaten. THAT grossed me out really badly. Ugh.
But since nobody is reading these anymore… I guess I’m alone down here at comment number 28.
uggghhhhh..
must.
stop.
reading.
Haha. Oh my.
Note to Mandy: never offer comments that may make people queasy.
best part of the comments yet…. “People feel bad when they make a mess. Cats seem proud of their handy work.” Ed, that was phenomenal!
miss mandy mac, I’m guessing that in elementary school, when show and tell week was “what I want to be when I grow up”…you weren’t dressed up as a dental hygienist, were you?
Um yeah…I am pretty sure we have been over this one. But I am not all about when people talk about bathroom stuff in front of me. Seriously why? That is private. PRIVATE people. I don’t need to hear about the sound or smell or size. I don’t even need to know that you need to go to the restroom or that it is even a possibility that you may have to go in the future. Seriously. Why? I think that I am breaking up with myself for even writing this comment.
Not a whole lot really grosses me out…My dogs sometimes do, but…we won’t go there because it’s just…well…ok…one of my dogs, I’m embarassed to admit, has the nasty habit of eating…(Lord, help me!) poop.
I’m sorry. It’s true. I don’t like the sound of other people eating, and I seem to have supersensitive hearing when it comes to that, (I make my husband go away if he is swallowing too loud! Am I a bad wife?) but it doesn’t make me gag. But the dog habit? EWWWW!! He seems to like them best frozen, as in the winter time. ok, I’ll stop.
Becca: this has been the worst!
Cathi: no!!!!thankyouverymuch
Kristi: if you don’t break up with you, i will – that was more than i ever thought i’d get outta the likes of you.
Lori: ok.well. frozen? that was MONSTROUSLY unnecessary.
Well, I read all 34 comments and I am officially NOT grossed out in any way, shape, or form. Not even the movie comment grossed me out. And why? Because it’s not real. It’s a movie. Duh.
Geez, you people have weak stomachs.
I do have a “gross-out” story–although it didn’t really gross me out, just kind of surprised me–but it concerns someone I love very, very much: my pastor’s daughter, who was adopted after The Vietnam War ended. She is mentally disabled–don’t EVER call her “retarded”
–so, really, what happened wasn’t so much her fault.
Besides, she has a heart of gold.
And besides, “the greatest of these is love.”
But I do have just one question: AM I THE ONLY ONE WHO HAS READ D. H. LAWRENCE’S “PROPOS TO LADY CHATTERLY’S LOVER”?!?!?!
Sheesh!
I guess the blind really are leading the blind.
I found something else that Tam is grossed out by.
Boobs. Specifically mine. Ask her. Or not. She might faint….again.
Lori… we had a dog that did that too… we called them ‘poopsicles’. It was pretty gross.
Brandy… that might be too much information….
More specifically…. when I talk about nursing.
Not as much info as you were thinking Heidi…I think.
HA!!
At least I hope.
i’ve never heard of lady chatterly or her lover…. sorry.
brandy & hw: why is this discussion on going??? we’ve gotta make it stop!!!
You started it.
(said in my best whiney voice)
Brandy… so it wasn’t too much information… it was too little info! Thanks for clearing that up. Did someone else say something?
Oh wait… this isn’t my blog…
Hey… roaches. Roaches gross me out. In North Carolina they have HUGE roaches! They call them something else, but they are still roaches. And they FLY!!!!
HW: I was baiting for the shock value I was hoping for from Mandy. But alas, she avoided that entirely. *sigh*
Tammy though, I can always count on her for some great SHOCK when I mention the “N” word. 
did that help? I nursed 3 kids… my oldest son, and my twin girls….
Hey! I’m still nursing my third!
I told Tam I nursed my second one until 15 months and I think she threw up a little.
Oh Taaaaaaaammyyyy
where aaaaaaaarrrrrrrrreeee youuuuuuu???
and its still going.
wow.
brandy: thanks for the shock value.
brandy – im still creeped out by you. youre gross.
“i’ve never heard of lady chatterly or her lover…. sorry.”
Is this a short-term mnemonic cognition gag?!?!? You ACTUALLY SERIOUSLY LITERALLY have NEVER heard of “Lady Chatterly’s Lover” by D. H. Lawrence?!?!?
You got some reading to do, girl!
ok. fine. let’s overlook that. so do i get credit for hearing of D.H.Lawrence?????
Mandy:
“Lady Chatterly’s Lover” is just a good old fashioned romance novel that dives into the dark heart of human relationships. In the “Propos”, Lawrence gets into so much detail about it you’d never know that he wrote it almost 100 years ago because it’s applicable today. That book opened my eyes like a sunrise at midnight.
And, Yes, I’ll give you credit for hearing of Lawrence.
I get really grossed out by the feeling of those little wooden spoons that come with ice cream cups rubbing on my tongue with no ice cream on them. Like when you’ve licked the ice cream off and you get a rough, wooden rub. It’s like a cross between fingernails on the chalk board and getting a mouth full of ashes for me.
justin: my husband is just like this… and also about cheap book paper, the rough kind. it makes him squeal like a girl!
TheNor: wow. sounds really really interesting.