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Friday, October 3, 2008 9:45am
I’ll start – with a glimpse of my life at a certain moment – in the moment – whatever is there. Then you’ll go next – leaving commentary on what’s happening in your life right now – in the moment. Ready?
The guy upstairs is practicing the guitar.
I can hear him. He’s getting better each week.
I can also hear the fan on my laptop whirring away the heat from the past hour. Thankfully, it keeps me warm when the apartment is a little too cool for my liking. New England in general is a little too cool for my liking. Actually – it’s a lot too cool for my liking.
My eyes feel puffy… But I’m ok with that this morning.
I just had a great conversation with a friend. A dear friend. One who is willing to call me at any moment when I say I need to talk. Friends like that make me feel less crazy – on the inside and on the outside.
Is it wrong that I’m still in my pajamas, and I’m glad I’m still in my pajamas? Before you go judging me – I will soon be getting up to get ready for the day – but right now in this moment I’m letting myself breathe. In and out. Just for a moment.
And I can smell garlic. International neighbors make interesting breakfasts….
I miss Drew. I am anxious to talk to him… Yes, he only left the house three hours ago. But I love him. And I miss him this morning. I want my puffy eyes to see him soon.
Scratch that. It’s the guy next door who’s playing the guitar. He’s much better than the guy upstairs. I’m impressed, actually. He’s got great rhythm and is pretty creative in his strum patterns. Maybe he can teach the guy upstairs how to play. Maybe he can teach me more as well.
I just heard a door in the hallway close. Maybe Drew is coming in to see me.
::
What’s happening in your world? Write Now.
Friday October 3rd 2:22pm …
My boys are asleep for naptime … my daughter is laying on the floor squirming and fighting sleep … My husband is sitting at the table working and I’m procrastinating …
I should be …
Dusting
Vacuuming
Doing LOTS of Laundry
Cleaning the bathrooms
the list could go on … but I’m not doing any of that … I’m sitting on the couch enjoying some kid free time and surfing the net. Oh and I’m still in my PJ’s as well … Life has been a little on the hard side lately …
I’m lazily listening to Blind Melon’s “No Rain”, hacking up a lung, and trying to figure out what to eat since I slept through lunch.
I’m reading the news, which is somber. A 90 year old woman shot herself in her foreclosed house. And I’m still confused about the Bailout- whether it’s good for the country or not, but as I think about it, I’d rather have the government do something about it rather than waiting for the economy to “fix itself” (1929 anyone?).
So that’s what’s going on (w)right now.
It’s Friday Oct. 3, 2008, 2:31 pm
Kingdom of Heaven is starting on the dvd player.
This morning, I’ve been experimenting with installing windows xp on a macbook pro. So far so good.
I’m typing this comment, through firefox, in windows xp, on the mac, so I must have done something right.
I’m enjoying a day off at the house.
Nothing going on until tonight.
I am also still wearing my PJs, because I can be.
10.3.08 1:27pm
I’m sitting here contemplating a nap. I’m on my couch with my windows open throughout the house and I can hear traffic. Well, I hear a car or truck every now and then. A work truck just drove down on our street. They’re building new houses on base. The wind is blowing outside and a breeze is coming through the windows. I can hear the dried leaves in the trees rustling. Off in the distance I hear the “beep beep beep” of a work truck backing up.
I just heard Dylan come out of his room and flick on the bathroom light.
Another car went by.
I smell apples. I filled a wooden basket with four bags of apples this morning and set in on a table in my living room. Green and red apples. They look pretty. They smell yummy.
My stomach hurts b/c I think I ate too much dairy. Dang dairy.
Here comes another truck. Sometimes I hate living on the corner of two through streets.
Oooh it’s a firetruck! A base firetruck so it’s small.
I am in yoga pants and a black fitted t-shirt that says “long live rock” in neon pink letters. On the back it has the Aerosmith logo in neon pink.
A bird sitting on top of the light outside is yacking at me. I think it’s a crow.
Peanut is barking to come in.
Am I done now?
October 22, 2008
1:40 pm
I’m sitting at my desk at work, wearing jeans and glad it’s Friday.
I’m clicking all over the internet, trying to figure out this mess called politics. I read one article, and I think Party A is right. Then I read a blog and realize Party B is right. I read an e-mail and decide to vote for Party C, even though Party C can’t possibly win. Then I read one more plug for Party B and realize Party A is the only logical choice.
Ugh. I am an intelligent, educated woman with strong opinions, values and standards. This should NOT be so difficult.
I’m stretching now, listening to my co-worker talk on the phone. Watching the clock. Waiting for 4:30…
-Fridays are my day off. Just got home from lunch with a new friend, followed by getting groceries.
-Laundry in–waiting to be folded and more done.
-Cleaning to be finished that I started before going to lunch
-Groceries waiting to be put away.
-Ten minutes before my guys come home from school and want my attention.
-Fighting having to make phone calls and emails even though it’s my day to not do church work at all—the life of a church planter.
-Off to the gym in an hour then fix dinner
-My 5 minute blog reading is done—back to work…
Friday October 3rd 12:04pm
-just got out of my training
-eating lunch of 3 musketeers and cherry coke
-in my office (my car)
-black slacks and blouse
-car temp 86 degrees (gotta love San Diego)
-on the way to see the “Smith” family who’s 8 yr old daughter was killed in this accident, im toughening my skin so i can be professional and have etiquette, when i really want to cry.
- i have days of paperwork to get done before dinner hits and my own 8 year old wants some lovin.
I absolutely love this idea. I hope its okay that i do it on my own blog!
Pingback: write now: 1 «
Angie: definitely.
WOW Y’ALL!!! This has turned out to be so much more interesting than I thought. Thanks for participating.
I just got home from what was supposed to be a fun treat day, but turned out to be not so much fun. We packed up Natalie’s schoolwork, drove through McDonald’s for lunch and went to a really lovely park where my children promptly decided they were not hungry and didn’t touch the food I just spent money on. Also, we got surrounded and stared down by a whole gaggle of geese. We worked on math and reading, then I realized I forgot the lesson manual so I had no idea what to do with the other work we brought. We then proceeded to the playground, which is one of the nicest we’ve been to – where all my children wanted to do was sit on the bench next to me. They did eventually get up and play, but not without some threats of me taking them home.
I’m pondering how lonely I’ve felt lately and wondering if I’ll ever find a close friend here – heck, or even just someone to go to a movie with. I’m also debating about whether or not to even type that because it makes me feel dumb and ashamed. Of what, I’m not sure, but that’s how it feels.
I miss my husband, who is out of town this week. I am anxious about our finances and hope this trip is worthwhile for him. I also hope he gets paid from his last job more quickly than he expects.
I’m very tempted to delete all of this with a quick click of the mouse, but it helps to get it out – even in a blog comment. Life has weighed heavily on me this week, but I have much to be thankful for.
1:51 pm.
34 minutes until I need to leave to pick up my first grader from school. she’ll be waiting for me and looking for the car.
my two year old is napping on the sofa downstairs. i’m in our third floor loft, the only place that is quiet all the time.
i just took a shower so my hair is wet and i’m not wearing makeup yet. i have to wear my glasses now when i read or when i’m at the computer because last week i had a headache that lasted for 4 days. i have no more headaches now that i am diligent to wear my glasses.
they need cleaned, though.
i went to two grocery stores this morning to find the things i need for my husband’s pumpkin carving birthday party tomorrow. my house is almost clean and i’m ready for a nap.
but i won’t nap.
i still have to get ready, and dry my hair, and finish a blog post that has been bopping around my brain since wednesday.
1:56pm.
29 minutes now.
i’m “listening” to CNN on mute b/c mark is taking a much needed nap next to me. I can hear him quietly breathe…i like that…a lot. How a breath can bring such inexplicable peace, I don’t know, but it does. and yes, as I already said, I like it.
Everything else is quiet from a busy day. I’m in my “comfy” clothes…i.e., jeans and a hoodie w/ the wood earrings Tam loved…I thought of her when I put them on this morning [oops, that's not right now, so does that count?]. I too am thankful for friendships…real friendships…they make me smile on the inside.
I just put on chapstick that smells good AND tastes good…seldom do you find one that does both…good multi-tasking chapstick. Thanks bonnie bell.
I’m pressing “submit”.
I smell BBQ meatballs. They’re in the oven.
I’m listening to Chris Tomlin’s new CD – (awesome by the way)
My dog is sitting as close to me as possible on top of the couch, so he can be by me, and see out the window at the same time.
My 8 year old is mixing up cookie batter in the kitchen with her grandma, who comes over every Friday to bake with her.
I’m waiting for my friends to arrive for our Friday Night Bible Study – that I LOVE!
My husband is cleaning his gun, as he will go bird hunting in the EARLY morning tomorrow.
(I am sitting here thinking Mandy is pretty cool, with cool ideas, and a great heart for other people)
i can only spare a quick second…
i am eating jambalaya, you see.
mmmmmmm…. b-bye.
I’m doing my best to be consoling to my husband who lost his father this morning. They weren’t close, unless Ross had something his dad wanted.
We’re trying to gather the funds necessary to pull off a super modest funeral, pay his passed due rent (we’re the landlord & the will lose the house if we can’t get it, or sell it this month), cover our airfare & find a place to crash for a week.
Sometimes I don’t understand why everything happens at once. We are at the cliff, ready to fall off & it feels like no one will catch us. I know that’s not true…but those are my feelings today.
Oh…I hear my littlest getting up on the potty by herself. She’s so big! She turns 3 on Monday. We’ll spend her bday in a plane. Eating peanuts. Sitting still.
My bday is tomorrow. I’ll be dropping my love at the airport. So he can eat peanuts & sit still.
Pray for us. We need a HUGE miracle right now. Bigger than I can explain. My heart is so heavy.
2:50 pm PST
i just finished my lunch…in n out: double double, animal fries, and a dr. pepper.
just before that, i drove from school to home, getting off campus in record time.
my left knee is killing me.
i can hear an ambulance racing down the closest major street.
my brother is on the couch, also on his laptop.
the pre-game show for the white sox @ rays game is on. currently talking about the angels (ugh).
i’m putting off the massive amount of reading that i need to do this weekend…a product of my extremely long week, when one thing after another just kept coming up.
ichatting with my best friend, who goes to a different school. wishing she was coming home this weekend.
i can hear my dog breathing deeply as she sleeps.
dogs barking outside.
thinking of changing into shorts…but that requires going to my car.
need to call the seamstress for my maid of honor dress for my cousin’s wedding (oy)…but putting that off too.
relaxing seems to be the only thing i can get myself to really do.
anxiously awaiting red sox @ angels. only 3.5 more hours…
i didn’t realize that was so long! sorry!
p.s. wonderful idea!
I’m sitting at my desk, which I rarely do (usually I’m on the couch with the laptop). I’ve been watching my 6 year old do math on the computer – she amazes me!
I’m now listening to my kids playing peacefully together (for the moment) in their playroom.
I took the day off today to recuperate from going with my dad to have a heart cath yesterday and getting up at 3:00 am to get to the hospital on time.
I’m looking forward to the weekend and being off on Monday and Tuesday to spend the first part of my kids’ spring break with them. Things are stressful at work, so it’ll be good to have a few days away from there.
I’m thinking about a meeting I had to go in for at work today even though I was off!
I hear ESPN on the downstairs TV. No surprise!
I’m trying to talk myself into getting up and going downstairs to fix tacos for supper.
I’m hoping you all have a great weekend!
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I’m listening to the news but not really paying attention.
I just heard Phat come in with dinner…YAY!
I’m contemplating new blog buddies and where friendships lead.
I know I need to get to studying but I’d rather play a bit longer.
8:20pm
I’ve just finished watching more episodes of West Wing season 7 than I care to admit. Drew and I have stuck close to one another this evening. He’s 6 inches away from me on the couch. reading. He loves to read. Cereal box ingredients, the latest grocery list, fiction, biographies, etc… Sometimes I tease him by saying that I wish I had words written on my forehead, then he’d pay attention. He laughs. He does pay attention. I’m thankful for him.
So we’re spending the evening together. But not really doing anything. This, for a moment, is good for our marriage. No agenda. No serious talks. No decisions. Just “being” together in the same place.
A little R&R.
For this brief moment of R&R I wanted to check in and see what y’all are all up to. I must say, I’m really touched by what you’re “write now’s” are. wow. I didn’t anticipate the strength of this post – and I certainly didn’t anticipate what would come in your comments.
I’m thankful – for your honesty.
JuliePersinger.
Mandy.
Heidi.
Touchofglory.
wow… thank you.
It’s 5:25 p.m. PST
- I just took a sample of my blood.. I am a diabetic.
- I just changed out of my work clothes, ya know it, I took that nasty bra off FIRST.
- Joshua Radin is playing closer on my laptop.
- I just finished dinner of fried chicken and potatoes.
- I’m answering emails and just amazed of HOW many people love me.
and how much they fill my life with joy.
mood- although very exhausted, I am very quiet and at peace.
I am listening to Phylicia Rashad singing Seek Ye first the Kingdom of God at the Hillman university graduation on the Cosby Show… .gotta love tv land.
I am also listening to my sleepy girl breathing next to me, my husband clacking away on his mac…the fan whirring…the cat purring…pretty much relaxing.
We just walked in the door from dinner and a movie followed by an ice cream cone as we walked around Neptune park and the pier. I am having a wonderful afternoon after a stressful week!
I have just finished the veggie portion of my meal plan, five meals about 3 hours apart, each about 300 -350 calories.
I was able to get the food down even while choking on the 300+ pages of “earmarks” that were attached to the “bail-out” bill to get it passed.
I did some blogging, and now I will try to get through a chapter or two of the David Foster Wallace novel “Infinite Jest”, it’s only 1,078 pages long.
Tonight I will be watching the final episode of the British TV mystery show “Cracker”, which I got in the mail today from Netflix.
I hope to get to my “poverty post”, for Poverty Blog Action Day, October 15th.
wife is upstairs, putting Jadyn to bed.
Asher is swinging in the swing in the living room, I can hear his blanket hitting something on the floor as he swings back and forth.
There is a train in the distance making way too much noise.
My throat hurts…has for a while, but I nearly choked trying to swallow.
My eyes are tired.
(I love this post concept)
9:09 pm
*I can hear Caleb watching Clone Wars in my room.
*I can smell the leftover taco soup from dinner that I need to go put up
*I miss Grace…she’s sleeping over at a friend’s.
*I’m proud of myself for writing and scheduling five different blog posts, including my “poverty” post for Oct. 15th.
*I winding down my blog reading for the evening to go spend some one on one time with my son. This doesn’t come very often, so I grab it when I can.
*Then I’m going to try to finish reading Bird by Bird.
*Then I’m going to sleep in…at least till 8.
It is 7:43 pm PST
It is raining outside. First storm of the year for us in Nor Cal. My son (15) isn’t home. He is at a football game at the High School. My daughter (13) is at the desktop computer on the other side of the room. That is the only way the kids get computer time….Supervised.
My husband is on the love seat doing a crossword puzzle. My dog is curled up at his feet growling at the wind. My cat is curled up next to me sleeping.
I am sitting here listening to Third Day’s latest album and Toby Mac Portable Sounds shuffling. I am trying to catch up on reading some blogs.
I feel God’s presence with me tonight.
My father in law is in the bathroom outside this master suites door. I can hear him getting ready for bed. I am praying that he sleeps well and is happy tomorrow. I am also praying for a soft spot to still be in my heart for him. These last 2 years living with him have been hard at times.
I can’t get Heidi’s little Isaac out of my head with his broken feelings. Sometimes kids suck.
It is now 7:51 pm PST
Chilling in the room that we call “the office”.
Listening to my husband talk back to the news on TV.
Realizing that my birthday is coming to a close.
Looking forward to sleeping in tomorrow.
Excited at the prospect of going to a movie with my husband tomorrow.
Hoping this slight head ache goes away soon.
Reminding myself how blessed I am that God gives me strength each day.
It is 11:30pm…way past my normal bed time but that is okay because it is Friday night and I get to sleep in tomorrow. I just got home from my friend Amanda’s b-day party. It was good to be with friends and make some new ones. It was fun to eat some hamburgers, drink a few beers and laugh and forget the stress of the week. I am doing my run through of emails and blogs before I am off to bed!
I can hear my roommate and her boyfriend in the next room whispering
I’m missing having late night convos with a boy
I’m thinking about how I met a cute boy tonight with whom nothing will probably happen
I just did the dishes
I really need to do homework
I can almost smell the crisp smell of fall which really makes me want to go north to see the pretty leaves
I finished Breaking Dawn by Stephanie Meyer and I’m going through withdrawal
I should go to bed.
11:35 pm
~I just finished grading and submitting freshman midterm progress reports.
~My pup, Payton is very sick. I’m aware of her sleeping by the foot of my bed.
~The television is on, “Sex and the City” is on. I’m not really watching it. Rather it’s background noise.
~My daughter Sammie just came in the room for a minute after her shower. Her laptop has died and she wants to use mine to check her facebook.
~I’m still in my clothes, which is odd. I’m the PJ queen. Wondering why I didn’t change as soon as I got in the house.
~My friend Lisa just called as I was finishing up grades. I’m so blessed to have her in my life. She was checking up on Payton and me.
~My head really hurts, and I should do something to stop the pain.
~It’s late and I’m still on the computer. Hum, what’s up with that?
~I should go to bed, but my mind is still whirling from the activity of the day.
My 27 yrs old legs came in the door to the apartment a few minutes ago.
I have already been working 4 hrs…definitely feel it;
Going up the stairs 4 times in 4 minutes, ugh!
Boo sleeps soundly on the floor, I think how nice it would be if we could switch places, if even for an hour.
I think to myself that I should eat something to fill my tired body, worn out by the week’s stress, and drawn out lecture.
I’m thinking a nice, honey roasted turkey and cheese sandwich, with mountain dew and some pringles will work out just nicely…
Oh yes, its a friday work night at Walmart…
It’s 7 in the morning. I’m not used to being awake at this hour. The baby and the oldest boy are in the next room. The oldest is playing his new ps2 game and the baby is watching as if he has any idea what’s going on.
The dog/hyena is scratching and biting himself compulsively. And I keep thinking I should take an internet break and get my coffee already. But it would be so nice to go back to bed.
It’s 3:13 on Saturday (9:13 EST). I have two sleeping children and the house is quiet- except for Starbucks who is squaking away. I’m sipping a still too hot cup of tea and I just finished my lemon cookie. I’m digging tea time every afternoon. I’m looking out the window and I can see all the way to the horizon… no other people, no other buildings, just animals, brown grass, a few trees, and an unusually cloudy gray sky. I’m waiting for my husband to come home.. he’s been gone all day filming a sotho woman making “home brew”… it’s cultural yes… but I have a feeling this wasn’t so much about film making as it was personal beer-making interest. We’ll see. I’ve missed him… being home with two kiddos is challenging and feels like a lonely task at times- even though I adore them. My tea is just right now… I’m going to soak in the silence, while it still feels like a friend.
This has fast become one of my favorite posts – all because of your responses. i LOVE them!!!
It’s Saturday 7:34 am pst.
How come my body won’t let me sleep in. During the week my my body awakes at 4 am, so I guess 7:30 is sleeping in.
My coffee sits in front of me here on the kitchen table as does my lists. Today is Saturday so my Allstate hat comes off and my ministry director hat comes on. I’m helping to design a cafe, all the colors are picked out and tiles and so forth, now the the important part, what kind of coffee to buy, what signage to design, logos, cups etc. A NAME!!! I am struggling for a name. I should make that a blog post, Name our cafe.. Sweet Idea.
I love Saturday mornings, nobody is aking me for anything and I can just focus on me for a minute.
ooh I better warm up this coffee a bit…
I’m eating cake quietly in my office. If the kids hear me, I’ll have to share. I’m not great at sharing.
Hubs is off to the West Coast today. We’re heading out on Monday, so I’m packing the 3 girls. Can’t forget their favorite stuffy, blankie & barbie. Oh, and their rubber boots. Papa said he’s going to put them to work in the horse barn this week.
It’s been a hard few months, but I am hopeful that everything will turn out ok. We’ve talked & decided that no matter what happens, we can live with it. If we lose the car, we have another that is paid for. If we lose the rental house, at least it isn’t our primary residence. Ross’s dad was our renter & he died yesterday. If we lose our own house, we could get an apartment. I’ve never lived in an apartment, but we will manage. If hubs loses his job, we can live with that. It’s not paying well anyway right now. The RV industry is NOT the place to be, especially being commission only.
I’m amazed at how many blessings have come our way since our financial slump. A vacation blessing, meals brought to our home, money in my account that I didn’t put there, a natural gas bill paid. Knowing that He is looking out for us is helping me let go of so many fears. But, I’m still holding on to a few…
Saturday, Oct. 4 noon EST
Just got back from starbux with a great friend. We talked and talked, even though we usually “do” and “do” when we’re together. This will probably go down in my memory as one of my favorite times with her. I asked hard questions, she gave honest answers. I shared difficult secrets, she gave much needed advice. I laughed. She laughed. It was good.
I had a GREAT blog idea in the middle of our talking. But, dang if it hasn’t slipped my mind. It was something telling – revealing – introspective about me right now… Sorry. I’ve forgotten it.
Laundry is calling my name. So is a nap. I’m spent. I’m tired in a deep soul way today. And I’m looking forward to making something delicious for lunch – just because…
Maybe chicken divan… With water chestnuts. Don’t ask. On second thought, you should ask. You’d love the recipe.
Sat. 10/3 – 12:55pm
I remembered the post idea: “weak”
10:59 am
just picked up a hambuger cake from the supermarket. don’t ask. he wanted it for his birthday when he saw it 3 months ago near the fourth of july. so i asked them to make it. they agreed.
now its in my fridge.
i’m cold (finally). its overcast and windy and we have a soccer game in 2 1/2 hours. i’m thinking about which sweater to wear being that they’ve sat in my closet since march.
there are 9 pumpkins on my front porch waiting to be carved by 9 kids coming over tonight with their families. ask me tomorrow if i’ve been able to clean up the pumpkin guts yet.
now i have to go and write my own blog post. i’m considering coming back to this post and writing once a day.
11:02 am
reading mandy’s blog instead of preparing for a presentation on Ego Defenses…
October 4, 2008 12:32 pm
i just finished reading one chapter for clinical child psych. only 3 more to go…
sitting in the living room with my family. my dad is watching dinner: impossible on food network. he has to make a dinner including chocolate in every course.
thinking about going to hide in my room to prevent distraction.
need to do laundry, but someone took over the washer. happens all the time.
my brother is talking about horror movies…he’s been having people over to watch classic horror films every night in october. they watch it outside, projected on a screen. it’s pretty cool.
i’d rather be playing wii right now.
the distractions are increasing…
it’s 4:30 p.m.
i’m still just sittin’ around in the t-shirt & underwear i slept in,
breath smelling of coffee and cigarettes.
i’m texting with donna, my old college roommate, begging her to drive from her hometown and meet me in statesboro for a night out at the bars.
she wants to. but she probably won’t.
i need to be there. in statesboro.
the realization hit me as suddenly but clearly as the need to eat.
i need to feel the way i felt when i lived there.
i need to feel like i’m on an adventure.
i need to feel large and in charge in the midst of knowing i’m small and out of control.
i need to get the bartender’s attention and say: “i’ll have a whiskey sour… and a buttery nipple for the lady.” ha. yeah. that’s what i want to say.
and then i want to do my version of dancing with as many people as possible. hopefully i’ll get some drinks out of it.
Me: Are you old enough to drink? I mean, yes, I know you are. but dang. I thought I was the only one getting older around here. Be safe.
6:13 p.m.
I just got home from volunteering at the beach concert. I sat in the hot sun all day but it was so worth it. I met Laura Story and her husband Martin. They really do have a story and I feel so blessed that I got to help them today. I worked at her merchandise table. I am really excited to get to post my pictures on facebook and then become her facebook friend and tag her so she can have the picture of her and her band member that she requested. Oh and I also got to reconnect with my hero’s parents. They told me they saw my blog post about her. Wow. My soul has totally been fed today. And now I am going to go feed my tummy with oh so healthy KFC.
7:17 pm
Just switched from the Florida State/Miami game to the North Carolina and UConn game. It’s been a relaxing day. Had some work done on my car and then came home and cleaned my house, talked to my mom and rested.
Need to do laundry…..maybe tomorrow.
It’s 10:52 pm. I just sent an e-mail, put a load of clothes in the dryer, started another load in the washer, and now I am waiting for my oh so healthy pepperoni pizza to finish cooking so I can celebrate the end of a long week.
10:07 pm saturday night (pst)
kids just got home from band practice.
listening to kassidi and brent talk about recording one of their bands original songs tomorrow after church.
i sliced my thumb a bit ago and its throbbing as i type.
im wondering why i havent been able to be creative. too many things going on around me right now.
i love activity of this home. i hear kass and kota talking outside my bedroom door. theyre encouraging each other about something. cant make it out.
the dog is pacing int he hallway. we have wood floors and all i can hear are his little nails clicking and clacking.
im tired and slightly anxious. but i dont know why. feeling…undone. like something isnt…right.
but i have joy! lots of it!
good night
I’m ridin the net at 3:54 am.
(Lest you are appalled…I always get up between 4 and 5).
Playing amateur psychologist and cogitating on Mandy’s fears about yellow. Conclusion: Pac-Man somewhere in her childhood. Ha!
Tried to go back to bed – 3:30 is a little early even for me, but ended up writing my guest devotional in my head – on the healing at the Bethesda pool (for Morning Coffee blog) due this Wednesday.
Love,
Jlo
Sunday, 10/5 4:59pm
Trying to figure out what the word “cogitating” means.
and LOVING the fact that y’all have come back all weekend to report here.
LOVE.
IT!!
Sunday oct 5 2:14pm pst.
Got home a little bit ago from church, my second home.
Maple bacon is sizzling by me and the smell is flowing throughout the apartment.
-My 15 year son is straightening his long locks for yet his 3rd party this weekend.
- I am not feeling well, my joints hurt and ache.
- But I am still on cloud nine from our services, a new volunteer that I had used today accepted Christ..
(brings chills)
- God spoke heavily to me in a beach journey yesterday and I am quieted today and feeling a release of freedom… and a flow of words are just beginning.
Sunday 10/5 3:01 PM
I am sitting here with my husband and my son switching the TV between the race at Talladega and the 49er game. I am waiting to see the Angels game. I am pretty sure they will lose tonight and be knocked out of the playoffs.
My pain level is higher then ususal today. so I have taken my medication. I continue to pray for answers as to what is wrong with me. Ohwell I have been waiting 4 years what is another year or two.
I am happy and peaceful even in the pain. I feel the love and prayers of my friends near and far.
I am making a list of things that we need to take care of before Craig and I leave for Hawaii in 28 days!
Morning Mandy,
Wondering if you all would have a look over here and see what YOU can DO.
blessings,
tammy
10:06 pm
I am thinking about my day and how I am facing grief. My friend with cancer has more hope than me. She preached a sermon to me on the phone today. I thought I was calling to be there for her and really she was there for me. My last client at work broke me to tears. And I don’t normally cry in front of people. I told her about the loss of my mom because she was sharing about her husband and life. I told her how I have been afraid to love since my mom’s death. And she with sincerity told me I need to open up. And I told her I commend her for loving despite possible loss-her husband in the military and her sister has cancer. I broke in front of this client and asked her to pray for me really meaning it and hoping she will. I am now thinking how does one open up to love again after seeing the last breath of her mother? I need courage.
you are oh so creative. i’m enjoying all the new “stuff” going on here at you.com.
: :
i’m sitting in my big easy, a huge comfy chair in my living room. niel is sleeping already, recently relocated himself from the couch into the bedroom. behind me starbucks is chowing down on some birdseed in his cage. i can’t see him, but i can hear him. it’s 12:30 at night; i guess he felt like a midnight snack.
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