One hot Georgia summer, about thirteen years ago, I spent hours each day sitting cross-legged on the floor of my parents living room, bent over a guitar, peering at the pages of worship choruses in front of me, trying to make out the songs that I hardly knew. My fingers fumbled from chord to chord. And I sang. And I worshiped. And I learned how to play the guitar.
Last night I had a tangible flashback of that summer. I sat cross-legged on the floor of my friends’ apartment, in a room with eight other wives, spending a few precious moments in worship before discussing this week’s homework for our Bible Study. As soon as I leaned into my guitar to see the words, I remembered that summer’s blue carpet and sun beaming down around me. I remembered how tender my fingertips were from the pressure of the strings. I remembered how tender my heart was in those days, before life left thickened it.
And I remembered my first love.
And I remembered who I used to be.
I let myself get lost in the remembering. I forgot that I was leading others in worship. I forgot the usual cues to indicate which verse or song we were singing next. I paid little attention to the rest of them there.
And when those few precious songs had passed, I found myself wishing that I spent more time on the floor… Down. Low. Humble. Receiving. Learning. Growing.
And I asked myself why it is that I don’t anymore…
Is it because life speeds up so much we forget to slow down long enough to even stop and sit…let alone on the floor…
Hmmmm…
Don’t you love it that God brings us to a place through our senses.
Ex: blue carpet – sight
sore fingers- feel
Music pages- sight
worship – Hear
It brings us to a place where our heart is not “thickened”.
I know I brag about it all the time, but really, my ocean and beach is that for me, I can truly unload there with just Him. As you sat there it sounds like you did the same thing when you worship with those wives, you let go.
Here’s the answer I think, Our hearts get thickened because we forget to let go. And we are in too much of a hurry to use our senses.
BUT when we do… we find our daddy God waiting for us, waiting to call us off the floor into His lap for those priceless moments…
M, don’t forget last night. He hasn’t…
It’s not getting down on the floor that is hard anymore….it is getting back up!! Dang bad knees!
For me it is letting my life get out of control with obligations and responsibilities of being an adult. Poor excuse I know……gives me something to think about!
I’ll second that ramsey!
Last night I began P90X for the first time with a friend. Let’s just say that I was on the floor a lot! And it was humbling…
…but it was definitely not as beautiful as the way you described your experience in this post.
Thanks for sharing that with us! Very inspiring.
Now that’s intense!
We should all have those moments. Lord knows I need to and today I will.
Thanks for that!
when i was in my first year of college, i would wake up each morning two hours before my 8 o’clock class every single day so that i could spend about an hour to get ready and then an hour sitting in the top of our mims auditorium (where our chapel services were held), talking with and learning about the Lord.
now, busy with school, church work, and keeping the house up, i miss those days more than i can say.
JR: Maybe we can remember them as laying the foundation?? But now we’re building up the building…?
Ram: Knees >> Good point.
It is always good to remember the time when you were really passionate about the Lord. To go back to the beginning. I don’t think we can truly go back to that point. It is a special thing, but I do think it is a reminder of how I once put God above all else. The love of the Lord is to come first in my life.
Tears for you …
what a beautiful time.
These type memories are the best.
Thanks for sharing, Mandy.
beautiful, mandy.
You just gave me goosebumps and brought some tears…thanks for sharing this!
i sit here wondering what the others thought of the worship experience. maybe your getting lost and your forgetting that you were leading made it a more authentic, raw, real worship time even for them.
i’d love to get lost in worship with you sometime.
You did. Remember? Kinda…? Maybe not!
i worshipped with you. i didn’t get lost with you.
not yet.
… gotcha.
maybe one day….
That would be nice. Lostness.
i love this.
i absolutely love this post.
my fave. like, ever. almost. there are several amazing ones. but i really, really love this!
its so…sensory. i was there, and then i was here. i was humbled – then i was inspired.
wow, girl.
blue carpet?