Most often, rest comes with ease. But I know the occasional night when sleep cannot be found. My thoughts are fast or my heart is heavy.
Or both.
Sometimes I wait for the night to rescue me by clouding the activity of my mind.
Other times I give in to the sleeplessness and find solace in solitude, letting my heart and mind settle in the silence of a still world.
Then there are the rare nights when I know sleep won’t come. Hour by hour, I check the clock. I watch the horizon – waiting – hoping – looking for dawn like a submerged swimmer watching the lungful of life at the surface.
The surface always breaks.
Morning always comes.
And I inhale again.
Advertisement
Believe it or not..
I get my best writing done then!! pages.
(not all of it makes sense)
I have many nights like these until I crash!!
Not breathing at Night ( Sleep Apnia) is so not good for you.
I too have known nights of which you speak.
While i have not yet found the cure for the heavy heart kind i find the mind racing kind can be overcome by getting up and hitting the keyboard and posting a comment, writing it down somewhere private or even using that old fashioned device – pen and paper – to get out of your head what it wants you to focus on.
Of course you being married and living in an apartment, if your mind wants to focus (naturally) on music that does pose more of a ‘problem’ huh?
i never claim to have ALL the ( or even a right) answers, i just try helping out as i can.
if all else fails a glass of warm milk! hot chocolate may be added if you find it is not a stimulant!
Speaking of which… you REALLLY did not mean to say you only have caffeine drinks in the afternoon and evening….. DID you???
<B
(yes I did)
I don’t know how you found my blog, but I’m glad you did! You are super cool and funny. (And I mean that in a sincere, non-stalkerish sort of way.)
That had sort of a W.B Yeats kinda thought to it:)
Katdish: HAHA!!! I am sure she is happy to have you here, its better to be a confessed blog lurker, than just look and not say anything:)
My name is Angie Sarich, and I am addicted to Mandy’s blog, okay. Perhaps I need an intervetion.
those nights, i seriously just want to get up and sit at my window, to watch the beautiful sky (country skies are extroadinarily superior) and listen to the Lord whisper to my heart, but i can never get myself out of the bed. i don’t know if i’m lazy or scared or just in denial of the fact that i can’t sleep…
just once i would like to get up and make the most out of one of those nights.
Kat: I’m your latest and greatest fan. Humbled that bloggy goodness like you would wander back over here.
Thanks so much for stopping by my blog!
and for your comment – loved it.
Be back soon!
Those are very beautiful written, and insightful, words.
I never got more than four hours of restful sleep when I was working.
Since I have retired I sleep like a baby, without the crying.
As a child I was afraid of sleep. The words to the following bedtime prayer freaked my out. I was afraid if I fell asleep I would die.
“Now I lay me down to sleep,
I pray the Lord my soul to keep.
IF I SHOULD DIE BEFORE I WAKE,
I pray the Lord my soul to take.”
Wow… very well written. I can relate.
Now I have to email my friend and let her know we’re not the only ones waiting for dawn on the rough nights. Are people embarrassed to admit that grief gives them insomnia? Yes. I guess so. Who wants to be a whiner? Well…some people love to whine…but most of us want to wear a mask. I mostly need an icy cool cucumber mask for the bags brought on by sleepless nights.
Thanks for this, Mandy. May God bless you and bring you rest.
Anita: Thank you for that last line. I slept like a baby last night.
I think this is going to be me tonight…I have a heart and mind that won’t settle down. I’m gonna go give it a whirl and we’ll see.
That was very well written.
i love sleep.
but i’ve been avoiding getting there… i’ve seen 7 AM come around quite a few times recently.
want to have a non-sleepover with me? [wouldn't that be nice!!!]