Last week, I read an article that challenged bloggers to behave as nicely as if they were in someone’s living room. Basically saying that if we wouldn’t act like jerks while we were at someone’s house, then we shouldn’t act like jerks on the internet.
I took the advice a step further. I asked myself if I communicate the same things on here as I would if I were in your living room.
The answer is no.
I don’t.
But, before you feel betrayed or shrugged off, let me explain:
If I were in your living room, then I have a face to face relationship with you. I probably know a bit about you. And you probably think enough of me to invite me into your house. And, of course, I think enough of you to receive that invitation. Even with that level of familiarity, I’d probably tell you things that I may not put on this blog. Why? Because I know you. I know who’s listening.
But on the blog, I don’t know who is reading. Yes. I know I have close friends and family who read this. But I also have total strangers that wander by.
Blogging is more like being in your living room while knowing there’s a hidden camera – with untold onlookers peering in at our conversation. That knowledge automatically shifts the conversation. It’s impossible to not be aware of the camera.
But should we? Should we be aware of the untold onlookers? Or should we just take off our shoes, kick back on the sofa with a hot cup of cocoa, and talk it out?
What do you think?
wow. never really thought of it this way, but you’re absolutely right! Kinda scary, yet at the same time we when we write things on our blogs, we are putting it out there for anyone to see! I have this “commenter” that always leaves mean and rude comments and I get so annoyed with him. Yet, the truth is that I put it out there, and with the internet….he can put it right back.
I think we should do option B… kick back and talk it out
My initial reaction is that we should always behave in a manner befitting the image we want to convey. I read a question written into an advice columnist stating “Should someone having a bowl of cereal and being alone= then pick up the bowl and drink the excess milk left after the cereal is all gone. the columnist responded this way==”It depends on whether you have as much respect for yourself as you do your associates.== I thought this applies to each phase of our life whether we are with someone or alone.
Be the person you know you should and commit to letting others know to whom you belong.
You raise a good point that anyone who starts a blog should consider. Every word we write, picture we post, can be seen all over the world.
Even if we are comfortable writing about out own lives we should ask someone before we write about anything that will caused them embarrassment.
My basic rule of thumb is what would my grandmother think about what I write.
Wow. This was good. I wondered over from a comment you left on my blog post about mondegreens some time in the middle of last month and I’m feeling like I wasn’t a very good hostess because I’m just now speaking to guest in my living room! Sorry!
Recently I made a new friend who is of a completely different religious belief than I am. I’m very honest and open about my faith and that won’t change. However, I think knowing that she’s reading, I’m more conscious of the phraseology that I use and that I’m trying not to use cliches that would be unfamiliar to her. I hope that I speak on my blog the way I would speak when I’m out in public: I always want to be true to who I am, without being rude to anyone who may overhear what I have to say.
Most of the “big” bloggers I read post WAY too intimately, in my opinion. Yeah, that hits Carlos and Abraham and Perry and some of those other big names pretty hard. Anne. Even Alece, in her gritty honesty.
I say that, not because their honesty or insight offends me, but because they assume goodwill on the part of readers that they do not know. There are multitudes of pictures, stories, and details posted that literally can NEVER be erased. Especially when children are involved. Those kids will grow up someday, and now they will find that their parents blogged about them in a very embarrassing way. Schoolmates learn things about kids that can all too easily be used in very hurtful ways. Suppose that Losiah someday has an enemy who wants to make his life hell. It’s not hard to find a lot of ammunition that looks “cute” at first glance. While it all seems inconsequential, I’m not sure that it is.
Such concerns are part of the reason that I’ve almost dropped off the blogging scene. It’s all too easy for someone that I know pretty well to find my blog, read something I wrote two years ago that obscurely references them, or their church, or their beliefs, and shizzam, a friendship is destroyed.
These blogs are not water coolers.
The microphones are everywhere.
Speak carefully. You might do a lot of damage.
i just simply wish you were in my living room.
love you. =)
And our conversation would (as you know) be far more than a blog post… Love you too.
i’d like to think i’m kicking back and just being myself, expressing my real heart. but sometimes i think maybe i’m only fooling myself.
::
we get to sit in the same living room very soon. eeeeeeeee!