I just had a long convo with a friend about social media and its positive and negative consequences.
And she had lots of questions about the relational and social and developmental ramifications of this mode of hyper-controlled semi-anonymous interaction. And the differences between virtual and real relationships. And how to navigate those waters. And I didn’t have all the answers.
And, yes I told her about Gitz’ life and legacy, and the countless people that I’ve virtual-met and real-life-met because of this medium. But, can I be honest? I also used phrases like “not real” and “point systems” and “game” and “winning.”
And I felt like I betrayed all of you in saying those things. Because you are real people and you’re more than a number on my stats page and comment link and twitter profile and facebook page and…….
I think the numbers can ruin it for us. They are there, in all social mediums, and they are impossible to ignore. They are enticing when they climb, and they are disheartening when they drop. And they make us focus on them instead of on the actually people who are on the other side of the screen. They betray us. The numbers simultaneously suck us into a point-system and dehumanize the experience. Everything that can be quantified will be quantified: likes, RTs, comments, clicks, mentions, etc.
But, you know, I couldn’t help but wonder what would happen if there were no numbers? Seriously. Think about it. What would happen to Blogging and Facebook and Twitter and Instagram and LinkedIn and Youtube and…….?
Would as many people be involved? Would they “play” the social media game? Would I? Would you?
My brain hurts.
It also likes the idea of no numbers.
I really don’t pay attention to follower numbers on Twitter. I couldn’t tell you right now without looking even an estimate of how many followers I have.
I’ve never looked at Klout. The whole idea of it annoys me.
I take a slight interest in blog hits, but not really, because i’m not a consistent blogger, and hits really don’t mean anything.
I really do value the conversation and the connection that social media can provide and how that can evolve into an offline relationship.
But I’m not really trying to build a platform. Blogging and social media isn’t a second job for me, and I’m not tying up my self-worth in it.
I don’t care about numbers, I care about people. And I’m not sure I could handle dealing with having a huge following where everyone knows me, but I don’t know anyone. I’m probably the exception, though.
You’re great at interacting, though. And I’ve seen it in all of those elements you’ve mentioned. You’re in here and you’re a presence. And, yeah, I think for those of us who can’t see this as a second-job, the framing of the interactions is totally different. I’ve found myself centering in the creative Christian community online. And I can hardly keep up with the conversations just in that circle!
yeah numbers are such a weird thing. i’d love to throw them out for sure. my brain hurts just thinking about it. and it’s like you can’t escape the numbers…because say you got rid of hits then what get rid of comments because those are numbers too and then you’ve gotten rid of the social aspect of it all which is just like then let’s go back to books but then even that has all sorts of numbers so it’s just a weird merry go round.
all that to say that i don’t know. i mean (insert jesus juke) jesus had all of his circles and there are even numbers on there…but it’s like back to the basics of what’s the heart and are we after man’s approval or god’s…such a hard question when you honestly look at it with some thought.
Exactly. Interactions = comments = numbers. There’s no way to get rid of them. And the numbers are there because they pull people in to do more and more and more. And then you go and mention that there are numbers of people in the Bible. yep. Now that just flips all of this on its head! Whew Great thoughts Katy!
I try not to think about numbers…
Years ago, when I led Bible studies, I had to work through this whole arbitrary assessment of success. The study for the new semester would start off with “healthy” numbers, but within a couple of weeks, usually only half the numbers were still involved. Was I that boring? Did my accent cause them to think I was stupid?? Was it my clothes/teaching style/freckles??? So many questions…ridiculous insecurities…
Finally, through leadership conferences, I understood the false measures of worldly success and began to see that God prodded those whom He wanted to attend. I could rest in His sovereignty that the people who needed the study most would be there. I was to be available to teach and pastor those whom He sent.
It helped lots. However, I had to RE-learn it in the blogging realm…I absolutely hate popularity contests and much of my measuring of self started over again. You know, 1 John 2:16 crud and James 3 wisdom…
Anyway…when I do see the numbers and wonder what’s up…I try to remember God’s role in all things. It’s really not about me. Never was…never will be.
Hope I didn’t take this somewhere else completely…it’s just what came to mind. :-/
I think this is a great response to my thoughts, Red. Your phrase “arbitrary assessment of success” sums it up. What are we doing here and why are we doing it? If it’s about numbers, then we’re doomed. And tormented. If it’s about people, then every interaction is a success–even the deletion of spam comments.
It’s all in our approach and reasons.
I have gotten so overwhelmed lately with all the social sites, the changes that facebook made finally pushed me over the edge, to where I am actually moving away from following, friending, and G+’ing. Lists have definitely become my tool of choice lately to help manage the noies.
There is definitely something to the interaction that goes on, I’ve been able to reconnect with so many old friends and make some new ones, but to just follow people to build up the numbers and hope that just maybe that one person you’re trying to get to notice you will, it just doesn’t work. The authenticity goes out the window and it reveals more about a person and their motives in the end.
Some days it just feels like school days all over again. Trying to fit in with the “cool kids’ or the “popular preppies” or whatever group is currently the “it crowd”. Maybe I’m just finally becoming comfortable with who I am and not needing that number validation anymore.
Eh, now my brain hurts.
my blog has no numbers.
it’s owner is not a consistent person. but she’s racking up new writing material.