Tag Archives: goals

To-Doing

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I’ve had four convos about to-do lists in the past four days.

In one, my friend said she didn’t want to make a to-do list because of how confining and limiting it feels.

In another, I told a rather fluent to-doer that I’m working on pacing my days and these little lists are helping me tremendously.

In another, I asked Drew if he had any extra index card storage boxes because my to-do lists are going on index cards and on the back I take note of meaningful things and quotes and moments throughout my day and I don’t want to throw the card or the moments away when the day is done. It’s all right there on that little card.

In another convo, a friend asked me to help her with something and I wrote it down on my little day-page and she asked me what I was doing and I had the privilege of telling her that I’ve started making weird to-do lists that help me get things done each day because I have so much time on my hands that if I don’t write out things that I want to accomplish I will just fart away the day and get nothing done. And I showed her my index card from the day before, and showed her how I segment morning, afternoon, and evening. And how I have two or three items in each third of the day, and how I have little mini-errand lists as well.

And she could see what items I’d checked off and which ones I didn’t (oops).

And I told her that even though I’m not getting it all done in a day, I’m definitely getting more stuff done than if I had no to-do list at all.

And then I said something really obnoxious like “BAM!! That is money. Right. There.” (Ok. That’s actually exactly what I said. And she laughed. So it couldn’t have been that obnoxious.)

And that is why I like to-doing.

Do you to-do? Do you have a secret method?

Hi. My name is Mandy. And I’m a pseudo-productive.

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audio embed, because that’s how I wrote this entire post–while getting in the car and driving to band practice…

I would much rather spend my time making lists & downloading the latest list gadgets than actually marking things off of said list. I find that to be psychologically satisfying and I think I read an article about it — about how we can actually fool ourselves into thinking we’re getting something done just by saying that we’re going to do something.  I think the same holds true–the psychological satisfaction–in saying that we’re making a list. And the actual making of the list is false productivity (pseudo-productivity).

I am a pseudo-productive. And I’m telling you, I get my list made and I’m really excited about it, and I think it’s going to be fabulous and it’s going to make everything better and make my life more productive and more impacting… and then I will just sit on the couch and watch Alias. That’s not the way to get anything done. But that’s how I do things sometimes.

So, my list-making efforts are inspiring, but they aren’t necessarily productive. So I wanna challenge you, as you maybe continue to move on: We are two months into our goals for 2011. And, let’s be honest, some of you may have already forgotten that we even have a goal.

I, for one–this year–am not doing so great in keeping my goal. And I’ve found that even trying to be organized–trying to have a streamlined process–a streamlined approach–is not getting me where I want to be in these songs that I’m trying to write. So, I’m still trying to work on the process and I’m lacking in creativity and I’m lacking in inspiration a great deal right now which is kind of frustrating. I don’t know. I’ve got to get back in the groove and I don’t know how to do that…

So I’m wanting to call us into this–call us to be diligent. And don’t just make a list. Don’t just say you’re going to do something. But actually mark it off. Get it done. Make something happen. And let’s all meet those goals that we’ve been making.

Yes? Shall we?

Yes. We Shall.

(So… What do you think of the audio version of this post?)

Belonging: So, the “cheers” bar in Boston is really big. A lot bigger than the one on TV.

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I’m in a group of women who are on this semi-secret mission to support a mutual friend as she completes a major life task. She invited us to walk beside her, and we’ve become a sort of sorority with secret bracelets and books. (Don’t ask questions. That’s all you’re gonna get outta me. I’ve been keeping this secret for 6 months.)

I’ve also been jamming with a bunch of my favorite girlfriends who have decided to be a bit of a girl-band. It’s like… it’s like pure security. It’s like I can walk into the room and know that I have a place at the “table.” It’s the complete opposite of my High School lunch periods, but that had more to do with me and my issues than any of them. (And I mean that, y’all. I know some of you read this.)

I felt that very same belonging feeling with my group of friends at seminary. We all rallied around one another for foot soakings and bible studies and birthday parties. I miss them…

I want to be a person who can share that sense of belonging with others. To create a “community” around my life. Especially since not everyone has that feeling. But, I know that the more people I invite in, the bigger the group gets. And, soon little groups split off from one big Cheers bar where everyone hangs out, to a two story bar/restaurant with lots of rooms and tables and mini-conversations happening all at once. And not everybody knows everybody’s name. Gah. That’s when my introversion kicks into high gear and I just wanna hole up in a corner of the room with two or three other people and have our own little thing going.

But, instead, I’m going to float between tables–spend deliberate time with deliberate groups in deliberate conversations.

*Here’s to making time. Cheers.*

How do you find that sense of belonging in life?

Am I one step away from being a wannabe?

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Sometimes I feel like I’m achieving this dream–this dream of being a “songwriter”–whatever that means. But most days I feel like it’s just out of reach–slightly unattainable. I can see it… but I can’t reach it.

What is “it” that I’m reaching for? I don’t know. Is it that one publishing opportunity? That one artist that slaps one of my tunes on an album? That one church that snatches up something I wrote?

Does that make me a real songwriter?

Then, the smart me starts saying “Hello? What makes me a songwriter is writing. If I’m writing, then I’m a songwriter. Who cares how many people appreciate the music. Am I doing it for them? Or am I doing it because I love it and believe in it?”

Right.

Of course.

I’m always right.

But the other part of me–the part of me that longs for some stability–for some validation in this non-lucrative dream I’m pursuing–the other me says that one day I’ll have to wake up and stop dreaming. One day I’ll have to face reality–and when that day hits, I’m going to be nothing but a person who once pursued the life of a songwriter.  I’m going to be a wannabe.

Dreams. Dreams are so flipping hard to chase. The reason they’re called “dreams” is that they’re not reality. And yet, in this world of the American Dream, where we see people bring their dreams to reality, we believe.

And there’s a God who puts dreams in each one of us.

So what do we do? Do we keep dreaming and striving to bring those dreams to life? Or do we one day wake up to the undeniable reality that has overshadowed our “dream” and tell ourselves that this must not have been the right dream all along…?

We didn’t throw a party…

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Did I mention that I recently read “Julie & Julia?” Read. Not watched. (Well. I did eventually watch the movie. Last night. And the movie was only somewhat like the book. Hollywood…)

(Meryl Streep remains brilliant, by the way.)

I thought reading the book would be a neat way to end 2009, since so many people said my 100 song wildness was in line with Julie Powell’s cooking through “Mastering the Art of French Cooking” in a year. With every page I turned, I realized that Julie Powell and I were not that different… until she went & got a publisher and book deal and all.

And, it must be said that Drew knew nothing of Julie’s wildness when he suggested this lofty goal for my 2009.

But that’s neither here nor there.

The point is this: at the end of the story, Julie throws a beautiful party to celebrate the close of her year – the achievement of her goal – the journey of finding her fulfillment. But we, in my real life journey of 2009, didn’t throw a party. Drew and I had about a 15 minute “yay” and then continued packing our apartment, or something like that. I did get some “congratulations” – but when the chaos of December got in bed with some sort of humility, we had one heck of a “flop” on our hands.

And now, 2 months after completing my 102nd song of 2009 (stupid overachiever I am), as the dust settles in our new home, I find myself trying to pick up my guitar. But I’m stuck. Stuck looking back at one of the most exhilarating times in my life… but there was no ribbon flapping across the finish line.

At The Chapel, we are learning to be very intentional about our “wins.” In short, define the target. And when we hit it, acknowledge it.

I don’t want to yell “GO ME!!!” – in fact, I even feel a tinge of hesitancy in hitting “publish” on this. But I do regret not having some type of celebration that reflected the wildness of my 2009 goal… Some type of “online party” with this blog-reading community, because YOU were the faithful ones who walked with me. Gave me honest feedback. Suffered through poor recordings. Et cetera.

Is there anything wrong with saying, “This may be one of the biggest achievements of my life?”

But, what does it matter? I’m afraid the moment has passed.