Tag Archives: introspection

Soul-Mining.

Posted on
26

Every time I see another news story about workers trapped in a mine I can’t help but think the world would be a better place without coal-mining dipping and diving down below the earth’s surface, down into darkness and danger.  I also can’t help but think they’re crazy to go down there to begin with.

How heartless is that?! Iamashamed.

But, permit me to ask: why would anyone want to go down there with all the risk of the world falling in on them?

Miners have some serious bravery. Bravado. Whatever it’s called. You know what I mean.

And they’re motivated for a reason. The Man is paying them a (hopefully) decent wage to dig down and dirty until they find coal. Obviously, that black flammable stuff is worth it.

I don’t want to make light of the nightmare they and their families experience.

I don’t.

And I don’t want to diminish their plight to a simple metaphor.

But…

I think there’s some dark crap truth treasure down in me. And digging it out feels a lot like risking my life.

Metaphorically, of course.

There’s something metaphoric and inspired to my coal-mining mind-wanderings, and it’s worth noting.

Here’s to Soul-Mining.

Re.Make.

Posted on
11

I’m getting itchy. Restless. Wandering. Listening. Questioning. Wondering. Waiting.

This kind of inner stillness is rare, and it always catches my attention–with its certainty.

and rush.

and standing.

I wonder how long it’ll last–but it won’t be long enough. There is little time. The moment will soon fade into the past.

In this moment I want to remake. I want to get out there and find the person I want to be. And I want to internalize all that she is, until I am she.

And I want the sound of my voice to sound like my own best friend, not my worst enemy.

I want to hear truth. I want to hear the things I want to want to say come out of my very own mouth.

I want the mirror to match my memory.

I want to be her.

Again.

Instead, I am poor.

Friday Finds (and, oh, there are some goodies!!)

Posted on
14
  1. Do you ever meet someone and immediately respect them? I officially met Chuck at a conference back in February, and he made quite an impression on me. This is from his blog, which he stole from John Maxwell: “We exaggerate yesterday.  We overestimate tomorrow. But we vastly underestimate today! When your mind is focused on yesterday, your heart will be filled with regret from the past. When your mind is focused on tomorrow, your heart will be filled with anxiety about the future.  When your mind is focused on today, your heart will be filled with hope. If you change what you do today, your life will change! 
  2. If you need some inspiration and motivation for your weekend creativity, go HERE. I found it via Jeff Goins (gah I promise I’m not obsessed with JG. I could talk equally as much about Ms. Messy Canvas if I wanted. And maybe I will.)
  3. Want to be challenged to dig deeper into yourself and find the diamonds that may be hidden? Go read some Messy Canvas. Her words are worth the time. & I like to call her The Messy Mandy (as if I’m not!)…
  4. And what’s floating around in my brain today? We cannot create from the depths if we are not willing to reach down and dig. So, this weekend, I’m doing some serious digging.
What are you doing this post-memorial-day weekend? Any creative aspirations on your calendar?

Get out.

Posted on
28
[We interrupt your blog-reading to kindly request that you participate in the little poll made especially for you--yes you--my dear blog reader. Many thanks and I'll see you in the comments. *hint*]

 

Even with the door shut I can hear the wind whirring and buzzing and swirling outside. But it’s not normally that easy. Most days I have to stand in it to hear it. To hear the quiet around me that helps echo back the words that are in my own soul. Today, I can hear it from inside.

But only because I made a conscious choice to listen. To stop the noise and listen. And what I heard today? Get out.

Just like that.

Get out.

Get out of the noise and clamor (don’t you love that word) of everything that’s drowning out my own thoughts. Get out into some wide open spaces, meadows, that have no rush of cars or people or conversations, but only have the slow stir of the breeze around me. Get out into these wide spaces in my own life and let myself think. Let my soul breath some clean air. Get out of the stale. Get out of the stuffy. Get out of the noisy.

I haven’t written a song in a while. And on more than one occasion, I’ve had the distinct thought that there are no more songs in me.

None.

Because right now I can’t hear any.

So I’m going to get out… Get quiet… And listen. Maybe it’ll be the beach. Maybe it’ll be the back porch. Maybe it’ll be the little nook in my kitchen where I have a clean shot at the coffee pot and bird feeder.

But I know that my soul needs to get out very very soon.

Where do you go to get out?

**Note: I wrote this over the weekend. Yesterday, I did exactly what I mentioned here. I pulled away for some chunks of time. And, you know what? I wrote a song. And it may be one of my best. Maybe… Maybe I’ll sing it for you soon and you can tell me if it is.

Sitting.

Posted on
35

Yesterday I sat still with her 5 month old boy hunched over my forearm, fast asleep amidst the noise and music and distractions that come with a post-church lunch at a semi-fast food burger joint. And we laughed. And I got to hear bits and pieces of her heart – of her life and what God is doing – how she’s changed and yet is still the same old friend I knew in highschool. And I was quiet – and I listened  - and I learned.

Later that night I spent hours on a new friend’s back porch- from the heat of day ’til well-past sundown… Talking. Telling stories. Telling secrets. I was quiet again. I did a lot of listening, but I got to know my friends so much better. And I learned about life, and parenthood, and college stories, and world travel, and all sorts of random things.

All from sitting.

And these days, I’m blind to reasons why I’m not as introspective now as I used to be. Why I’m not as self-aware. Why I can’t tell you what I think or feel about certain things.

Maybe I should just sit more. Away from the laptop or cell phone or to-do list. Away from productivity and information overload.

Sit.

And listen to my own soul tell me its secrets – tell me stories that I haven’t heard in a while – or stories that I haven’t heard told before. Maybe then I will know myself again. Maybe.

What do you do to know yourself?