Did I mention that I recently read “Julie & Julia?” Read. Not watched. (Well. I did eventually watch the movie. Last night. And the movie was only somewhat like the book. Hollywood…)

(Meryl Streep remains brilliant, by the way.)

I thought reading the book would be a neat way to end 2009, since so many people said my 100 song wildness was in line with Julie Powell’s cooking through “Mastering the Art of French Cooking” in a year. With every page I turned, I realized that Julie Powell and I were not that different… until she went & got a publisher and book deal and all.

And, it must be said that Drew knew nothing of Julie’s wildness when he suggested this lofty goal for my 2009.

But that’s neither here nor there.

The point is this: at the end of the story, Julie throws a beautiful party to celebrate the close of her year – the achievement of her goal – the journey of finding her fulfillment. But we, in my real life journey of 2009, didn’t throw a party. Drew and I had about a 15 minute “yay” and then continued packing our apartment, or something like that. I did get some “congratulations” – but when the chaos of December got in bed with some sort of humility, we had one heck of a “flop” on our hands.

And now, 2 months after completing my 102nd song of 2009 (stupid overachiever I am), as the dust settles in our new home, I find myself trying to pick up my guitar. But I’m stuck. Stuck looking back at one of the most exhilarating times in my life… but there was no ribbon flapping across the finish line.

At The Chapel, we are learning to be very intentional about our “wins.” In short, define the target. And when we hit it, acknowledge it.

I don’t want to yell “GO ME!!!” – in fact, I even feel a tinge of hesitancy in hitting “publish” on this. But I do regret not having some type of celebration that reflected the wildness of my 2009 goal… Some type of “online party” with this blog-reading community, because YOU were the faithful ones who walked with me. Gave me honest feedback. Suffered through poor recordings. Et cetera.

Is there anything wrong with saying, “This may be one of the biggest achievements of my life?”

But, what does it matter? I’m afraid the moment has passed.